Good question... I dunno what is the answer to your question. I'll do some research in Google and get back to you if I bump into an decent answer. You should email the people at Medifast as they probably can answer it..
Morning, Penny. Hope you're able to have your hot drinks and soup today. As in - hope you don't lose power. Over 45,000 without power around here..
Having crunch bars all day might cause your help to scatter...
Morning Penny and Cault, hope you both have a great day, stay warm and keep your power!!.
It just started pouring down rain here, but at least it's not snow.
Morning all. Ice here, not a lot of snow. Maybe 2-3 inches with about 1/2 inch of ice on top so far and more ice falling. I hear it tinking on the windows..
Well my aged parents made it out yesterday for their two months snowbirding in AZ. It was touch and go (their 6:15am flight finally left at 7:20am)...
Good morning all. Ice here as well and the rain has started. They say sun and 40 degrees by this afternoon? Really....all I want is the sun..
Won't be back until late tonight, so don't write too many pages..
Have a great on plan day everyone.....it is the only way!..
Morning Penny, caulk, Anna, mt......Lots of snow for us, the ice is staying a little south of us..
I am 100 percent OP today.....lots of tea is in my future.
Stay safe all..
Wow, we got DECKED. Maybe a foot or so of snow overnight, and then it drifted badly. So far, it's drifted halfway up the garage door and still coming down. Jim had to shovel so the dog had a place to piddle!..
I can hear the ice starting outside... hearing icicles falling, too...
At least we didn't get any snow. Pure ice, so the high winds today are not causing any drifts. They are causing havoc with power lines/tree branches which are already stressed with about an inch of ice...
Yea but Phil said it will be an early spring and we know that is an exact science..
Not only Phil, but Buckeye Chuck confirmed it for our neck of the woods. Gee - do you think ANYBODY is seeing a shadow today? Think not...
Good morning TLers! We got ice overnight but the roads don't look too bad now. We have a 2 hour delay for work. Hope all of you that got more or are getting more stay safe and keep power!.
MT - glad your parents made it out okay!..
Good morning TLG.
I hope you all stay warm and safe today. Sounds treacherous out there. We have high winds today, and are under a high wind advisory..
I'm off to get ready for work. Busy day ahead..
Have a great OP day everyone!..
Morning everyone! Lots of snow here and still coming down. If there was freezing rain overnight as predicted, I didn't hear it and it's already covered with snow. I'll know more once I venture out...to clear a path for the dog and fill a couple bird feeders. DH got most of them yesterday, but my suet feeders are low or empty. Gotta take care ofmy feathered friends in this mess!.
My work never closes - we're the power company.
, not the ones that bring the power to your house, but the ones that take the BIG volts across country. I'll be working from home today making sure the 'powers that be', pun intended, can monitor the grid..
For another OP day. Soup sounds good....wish I had enough CN to make that crock-pot soup....I'll go to go soak some chili...that'll have to do for a Mexican flavor. Some fish and wasabi cauliflower for dinner sounds good, too. Thanks, Penny! I was getting bored with my plain mashed cauliflower - never thought to add wasabi..
Well, it's just to be expected - we're ALL committed to an on plan day, cause that's what we DO! It's not a choice, it's a way of life...
So, my bosses cousin does some kind of laser thingy to help people stop smoking, but he also does it for stress management and weight control. So, she says to me yesterday, he's coming in, let's sign you up for a session (free) for the weight control. It will really help your cravings. I say, I don't have any cravings, and she looks at me like I'm crazy. I tell her, I'm back on Medifast and I have great support (you guys) and I don't need any laser. She keeps going, says this way you won't have to BE on a diet.
She just wouldn't let it go!! *eye roll* Can you believe it?.
In other news, I'm really excited about exercising this morning. I love Chalean!!.
MT, so nice that your folks are with you! Do they stay with you in your home?.
Wishing all the snow/ice folks a great day! Penny, enjoy your time with your DD..
So, I'll just say it, because maybe more than one of us are thinking it. I don't think we need to declare our 100% OP days every day in the thread. We ARE TLers, it goes without saying that we are having 100% days, it's not like there's any possibility of any other kind of day, right? I want to support each of us in our challenges, but, at least for me, being OP isn't the biggest challenge anymore. It's enough for me to come here and read about everyone's victories and NSV's and fun in their slimmer bodies, etc..
Of course, there are challenging food situations in life, but we've all come together here because of our commitment to handling them as the powerful women (and men) that we are! And our power comes from our ability to plan ahead, be clear about what we really want, and hold our vision of health higher than any momentary "though" about something that might sidetrack (or derail) us...
It happened. I've always heard about it, but never had experienced it. Last night I was RAVENOUS. Like, seriously couldn't even think about anything other than food. I was almost in tears because it came out of nowhere. Did my usual routine, had my usual meals and L&G and then BAM! B|itch-slapped with an overpowering desire to just eat...something, anything.
(where's the fries)??? I looked at my husband and saw a bag of Ruffles sitting in the chair instead. My kids could've been little jars of chip dip running around..
So I ate a Medifast bar and went to bed. Fell asleep almost immediately too, thank God. This morning I feel like my normal self. Ate my oatmeal, sucking on my water and wondering what the he|| happened..
It was almost like I was freakin' possessed. Yes, I do have my period (for the second time in 4.5 weeks...thanks MF.
) but can that one thing alone explain it?.
So glad sanity has been restored. Hope THAT doesn't happen again. *shudder*..
I am always hungry like that he week before my period, which is this week for me. Once I figure it out I just remember that's the reason and move on...
Nice job staying in control, Connor!.
Lynne, I'll add (because others may be thinking.
, too) that I find it helpful to declare 100% OP days. It's a reminder of my commitment to the group, and more importantly to myself. I think most would agree..
More food for thought from a fellow Medifaster on the differences between interest and commitment:.
*"Well..it's just a little bite...I've been good...it won't hurt.".
*"It's my birthday (anniversary, vacation, girls night out, Cinco de Mayo...pick an event) You don't expect me to stay true through that, do you?".
*I'm not really hungry...so I won't eat all my meals...I may lose even faster".
"I'm TRYING to drink enough water".
*"WOW...I can eat anything I want if it's this easy to lose again".
* "I am prepared for any event. I know I can take my food anywhere and be happy.".
"*I know if I'm true to this program, it's easy to do. There is NO way I'm veering from the plan. Nothing is worth messing this up".
*"I will have my sparkling water with lime in my fancy glass and feel like I am included in any social situation".
*"Nothing tempts me...because I've already decided".
*"What else is there for me to learn to make sure this weight loss "sticks"".
Which would best describes you?..
GL - What the heck do they laser for weight loss? Seems to me that the only way you could lose weight with a laser procedure is in the wallet. Crazy-talk...
Goddesslynn - good for you sticking to your guns. It proves that you are looking at this as changing your life, not just a quick fix. When I tell people Im on Medifast they act like it's pretty much the final step I can take before I do lap band. They just don't understand at all that I'm actually taking steps to make myself healthy and learning a new way to live..
Connor - good for you not giving in to temptations last night and just going to bed! I'm always ravenous during my period, so I can relate...
I agree and what if the doctor hiccups or something? Thenyou end up lopsided!..
I'm stuck at home again today. I tried to make it to work this morning, but my car got stuck (and I mean really stuck) right in the street as I pulled out of my driveway. It took my husband an hour to dig it out. It's not that we got that much snow, but it's blowing so hard that the drifts are high and the wind chill is 30 below, so it's really hard to be out there for very long if you have to dig your car out..
I have tons of work to do from home today so I'm going to try and be on here a little less than I was yesterday..
Here's looking forward to another OP day!..
I know, right? It's just another gimick (sp?) preying on desperate dieters. Makes me a little mad...
Good Morning TL'ers!.
Interesting conversation about declaring or not declaring a 100% day. I don't care. I think everyone needs to do whatever works for them, as long as they ARE 100%. I don't know if you all saw it last night but we were wondering where De was. Rachel suggested that maybe she didn't want to come back here until it was a no-cheating zone. I just want to say that it should be a no-cheating zone every day.
And that's why I wanted to be part of it..
I'm not sure what people should do if they DO slip, but coming here and learning about one slip after another really chips away at my "mojo" around this program. I was part of a group over the last few years where we all just enabled each other and slips started to be the norm instead of the other way around. I simply can't afford that here..
I don't even think I realized that my former group (not MF) was an enabling group until I came here, and found this Tough Love group. Here, the commitment to 100% is IRONCLAD. I got stronger and more confident because I was surrounded with the same ironclad commitment and each person's success was like a building block for more success in me - and in the group as a whole..
I've only been here about five weeks, but I NEED this ironclad commitment, and I need a group that is successful and that our success feeds more success (if that makes sense)..
I mean no harm to those that have cheated, I just hope I don't have to read any more posts about someone slipping for a LONG LONG LONG time. Having said that, I don't know what to suggest people do if they do have a slip. Maybe there should be a "true confessions" thread or something..
Sorry I don't have a solution to offer. Just letting you know how the group's success, or lack of it, impacts me. And I know my success isn't dependent on anyone else - but it sure helps!..
I don't want people to be afraid to come here and admit to the truth, so we need to be supportive - BUT, I don't want it to turn into an enabling zone, either, which is what we often see on the boards..
No, it's NOT ok. No, just picking yourself up and getting back on plan is NOT enough - we're working on getting our heads right about food on a permanent basis. No, being "only human" is NOT an excuse. And if it happens repeatedly, it's time to question your commitment and your purpose..
There's a fine line in there, it sometimes it's hard to walk. People need to be honest with each other, if our support is going to be meaningful in any way, but the *smacks* have to be meaningful too. Which means that periodically we'll have to have these HWTAWWD (How We Talk About What We Do) talks, and periodically re-agree that 100% is THE Commitment...
Sounds like the "Nailed" banner might not have been a bad idea after all. The threat of flashing something grotesque for a week can really bite...
I'm on board! 100%OP..
I did get all my water yesterday but I didn't finish until bedtime. I made chili for dinner. It was so yummy. My only problem is I can't have red sauce or citrus things. Rolaids were my friend last night..
I'll be heading out to work shortly. They didn't close the mall. ;(..
I'm sorry, I realize that I was out of line. Of course, we are here to win, and each of us needs to do what will work for us. I didn't mean to make anyone wrong for doing what works for them..
Tkd, I like what you said about this being a "no-cheating zone"!! It's refreshing to come here and not read about cheating all the time, or how to tweak the program and fudge the system...
Yes, and I for one, need to reinforce that.
, or my sicko head tells me it's OK to have [fill in the blank]. It's the addict in me...sometimes quickly, sometimes slowly...I'll get it and make it a way of life if I keep hangin' with the winners..
Morning all! Some really wonderful and inspirational comments this morning! I hope all who are stuck in the blizzard stay safe and warm!.
I'm committed to an OP day, as well as all the rest of this fantastic group...
I completely agree Tkd, with pretty much everything..
Even about the former group enabling. That was me too and I don't want that here..
I didn't see the discussion last night, but I did pm with De a bit yesterday and it looks like she will be done with the boards for a while. I'm not going to go into the entire convo, but everyone already knows that the constant cheat posts were the biggest part of it. I knew it before I even pm'd her to inquire..
Anyway, I really need this group and I need this group to be strong, so I'm totally on board with committing to 100% ALL THE TIME...
Hi TL friends!.
On a good note... It is just beautiful here in Oregon. Sorry for your troubles if the weather is getting you....
On a sad note... I really did bad yesterday... I gave in to my fat brat and once I started, it was hard to get back on. (Insert Kick in the Butt here) But by afternoon I was back to a bar, a L&G and a pudding....
On another good note... I am back OP today For Sure! I have just got to do this..
I really appreciate you guys... I see that when I am 100% OP it all works wonderfully..
So - I am on Day 1...
Good morning everyone! For those who missed my post yesterday... I'm Kendra and I'm inviting myself into your group :-).
I'm in SW Washington, so I can't really empathize with the snow and ice issues.... I've been watching on the news and it's just unbelievable. Somehow the snow has completely missed us this year. It is chilly here this a.m. though... about 29 degrees, but clear and sunny.
I'm on Day 4, and feel AWESOME!! The first three days weren't nearly as bad as I expected, but today I really feel great. Last time I did Medifast I was obsessive about weighing myself daily, sometimes twice a day, and I decided I'm not doing that this time. Once a week, that's it. So I don't know how much I am down, but even after just three days my pants are looser and I feel more comfortable in my skin, if that makes sense!.
I'm off to work, will try to get back later to check in... picture & ticker are coming soon! I love this group already, especially the no-cheating attitude. Tough to find sometimes on these boards. So this is great and I have a feeling this will help me immensely in staying on track!.
Have a great day, everyone!..
Is this becoming the Cheater-A-Day Group?.
Just wearing the banner doesn't work. YOU have to work at it; you have to believe it and live it every day..
What happened to:.
Medifast is a wonderful program with many different types of support and a fabulous community. We understand that everyone is an adult and this is not a "mean" group. For some of us, we thrive on this program if we have a place where we are held accountable, where we commit to the program 100% and where we have a place to chat with others who feel the same..
What we believe:.
1. Cheating on Medifast is NOT a strategy to get us out of our fat suits.
2. The only way for us to learn about our problems with food is to take the word "choice" out of the equation when it comes to Medifast. Our only "choice" is 5 packets and 1 weighed and measured lean and green a day.
3. We look to those who have been successful with this strategy to continuously remind us about why this way, for us, is the way to go.
4. We believe that, even though we are completely committed, knowing that we have a group that holds us accountable for our actions is both useful and important.
We commit to:.
1. Remove the word "choice" from our vocabularies.
2. Follow the Medifast plan as written, including transition and maintenance.
3. Tell our "inner brat" to shut the H-E-** up and quiet him or her through abstenance from off plan foods.
As it is, the banner is meaningless..
Sorry - but I just can't believe this past week. <sigh>..
Come on Peeps!!! I don't want this group to disband before it even has a fighting chance...
Not much to say right now, I guess. I seem to keep posting my daily updates after everyone's gone to bed, so I'll once again add that the exercising seems to be sticking, and also! Today the scale finally gave me a loss for the first time since my lowest weigh-in last weekI was attributing the "stall" to the exercise and water retention. Nice to see it moving again (even if it's only 0.2 lb.).
It makes me very sad to read about De taking a break from the boards, especially for the reason she is. She's one of my favorite posters, really. And the daily cheat is discouraging too, considering the fact that a large motivator for me to turn down the daily (yes, still daily) tempting fatty food thoughts is the camaraderie of this group, right here...
Congrats Rachel!! As one who hates to exercise, I know what an accomplishment that is!!.
Keep it up girl!..
Rachel - you rock, girl! Congrats on the loss - any loss is a win!..
I am delighted to see this morning's conversation, as I was planning to log on here today and ask that this not be a cheat-of-the-day discussion group. And here you all are, ahead of me!.
Can we have a group rule that this thread, here, is ONLY for 100% OP discussion? And if you have to "confess" something you do it in PM, your personal blog, or over on MFC with all the rest of the true confession posts? That would help me know this is a safe place to come for supporting the 100% thing..
That's not a bad idea, Freya. We're all supportive to one another. But filling this thread with cheat talk is disheartening. Asking for support in a PM or an email is probably the best way to handle a cheat. Really, we want to see the group succeed, but what kind of "Tough Love" group lets cheat after cheat happen? I'm not pointing any fingers. I believe I got the first smack on this thread.
I think you'll see many banners already voluntarily removed because perhaps it just isn't taken very seriously...
I'm for it. I know I've mentioned it several timesI'm still having shaky moments where I badly want to eat off-plan foods, and reading in here, of all places, about other people doing it is not helpful to my resolve...
I am all for it! I am 100% OP! Have been since I started MF. I joined this group because I wanted to be around like minded people..
We are all struggling with bad food choices. That is what got us all on Medifast in the first place. It's tough sometimes, it's inconvenient sometimes, it's not social at times. But we have to do it. Period. No whoops, no oops, no mistakes, no excuses!.
The name of the group is TOUGH LOVE 100% OP WORKS!..
YAY DEEEEEE!!!!! OMG De, we'll be better, we promise! Please don't leave us again!!!! *crying*.
Okay, so unless discussion trends a different direction, I'd propose the following addition to the rules at the top of the thread:.
"This thread is ONLY for 100% OP discussion. If you have to "confess" something do it in PM, your personal blog, or elsewhere on the boards. Here we live and support 100% and the discussion reflects that."..
Also, I think if we have people just "dropping in" just to tell us about a cheat or something like that, we should let them know right away this is NOT the place to do it...
I 100% support this idea. I also want to honor what Steph said about people needing to be able to tell the truth, and I hope going to another thread or talking to someone in PM will provide that..
Like Rachel, I still struggle. Somedays I'm lucky and I don't but two nights ago I was white knuckling it and had to lean on my jell-o snack and everything. What kept me OP was knowing that I had not only made a commitment to myself but to this group. Your strength helped pull me through..
If we do agree to this rule can we please put it on the opening statement in color or something?..
OOps! You guys were way ahead of me..
Freya I like the language of your rule..
DE - Welcome Home..
Honestly, in maintenance it's struggle some days for me to eat enough (De syndrome), others I find a trigger food and I need to divert myself from it until it goes away. I want to maintain. I'm determined to stay OP and keep this weight off. I need a place to go and hear others with the same mindset...
Hello! Chickie, hope you dont think Im stalking you, but, I need somewhere other than our other online home to come and be accountable..
For those who dont know me, I was succesful before in losing almost 40 lbs on MF. (From 184 to 148). (And I did it by being 100% ON PLAN! I truly believe to be successful you must be)..
148 was awesome. Hadn't seen that in years, and so I stopped. Now I want to get past comfortable and on to hawt..
I started this round about two weeks ago at 158 after a pre return to Medifast binge. yuck. Now, I am aiming for 137 by my 37th birthday which is in 9 weeks. An ambitious but totally doable goal..
Hi Erin!!! I don't have access to the loser cocktail chat over there so I wasn't sure which of you girls was doing this still..
Glad to see you here! I super love this group and you will too!.
I've been trying to get Kristi to come over. Has she been posting in the cocktail chat?..
I have a confession.....I LOVE THIS IDEA!!! 100% op OUGHT TO MEAN JUST THAT...
Hi ya'll, I'm Lucy and am currently living in Houston. My daughter and I have been on Medifast since Sept 1 (100% OP, in fact) and are loving the program. She's in Transition now and I have a few more months to go before I'm at goal..
It was not easy in the beginning but I set my sights on my own goals and disregarded anyone else's desire to feed me. I travel a LOT for work and being able to take bars with me has been a godsend. I don't have to fret over restaurants for every meal and for the one L&G, well, most places have salads with grilled chicken or grilled chicken with steamed veggies..
I love the idea of a Tough Love discussion thread. All the cheat-talk on the blogs is boring and depressing...
Boy do I miss a lot when I am MIA.......I will say again the only reason I ever made goal was by shadowing folks here that didn't even know I was doing it....ie: De and Corbie....so my confession is I would read their posts and sometimes say, wow, that is a little harsh or even bitchy sounding. Then I would read it again and say but they are SPOT on.....! And of course De always had the disclaimer. I snark therefore I am......the 100 per centers were why I made goal. And why although I am struggling like crazy in maintenance I am still here every day......You guys are much loved..
Hi Lucy and Erin.......
Love the new line Freya...........
I'm all for the addition to the rules..
I have to admit, the daily cheat posts have just reminded me way too much of the MFC forum, which I find more than a little nauseating and depressing (not to mention very hostile and scary)..
I understand that everyone here struggles from time to time and life can happen, but what we need to learn is how do deal with those issues life throws at us without turning to food. I like the idea of Pm's for people that are truly struggling and didn't just have an oops! Frankly, I don't want to get pm's for every "oops" that happens. But when someone truly needs help to either get through a tough time or recover from one, I want to be there for them, we all do. If members of the team think the daily oops is acceptable, then this should not be the place for them. I know that a team that feels that way is DEFINITELY not the team for ME. There are plenty of other groups out there that will pat you on the shoulder and hand you a broom to "sweep it under the rug"..
I think that now is the time for the members of this team to reevaluate and determine if they have what it takes to wear that team banner..
For now, I'll just sit back and see where this takes us. I have been lurking and appreciate being missed...
You only think I'm sometimes harsh with you guys. You should hear the way I talk to myself. Really..
I am my own biggest fan, but I'm also my harshest, toughest critic. For me, the most important thing I had to learn was self honesty. I learned a long time ago to be a little compassionate with myself, but compassion and sympathy don't solve the problem when it's underlain by lies. Oh, we DESERVE it. Just one won't matter. There aren't THAT many calories.
My diet isn't THAT bad, I've just got a slow metabolism. blah blah blah - trash, garbage, and horsesh!t..
We need to be compassionate with each other and ourselves when we're being honest. When it's just more of the lying crap that made us fat to begin with, we need to reject it - in ourselves, and in others. Liars can't lose weight and keep it off. It takes complete honesty..
Yes, we CAN help it. Yes, we CAN resist, if we choose to. No, it was NOT a slip, not a mistake, not a whoops, it was a flipping choice and we made it deliberately. Yes, we're "only human" which means that we can do anything we decide we WANT to do. If we don't lose weight and keep it off, the truth is that it's because we CHOOSE to be fat...
Corbs - YES! Thank you for saying what I was thinking..
De - I agree with you, too!.
I thought the team rules stated very clearly: 100%. Not 100% when you can - just keep it off the board. WTH? No, I believe it SHOULD be discussed when it happens. Therefore, accountability. But it should just never happen! Just do it! If you can't, then, I hate to say it but find another team..
Wearing the banner and 'fessing up on the MFC board makes our whole team look like hypocrites..
If I remember correctly, it was about 3 cheats within a short time frame that splintered the original Rogues.. Yes, we were THAT serious! The team was around for a year(?) with MAYBE 7 cheats for the entire team. I remember that flashing banner quite well and fought through my cravings so I didn't have to wear it..
And we got folks to goal - almost weekly. That's why we're here..
Sorry if I'm harsh, but wanted to share my thoughts...
I think if you do go off plan you must remove the banner. You have to be back 100%Op for at least a week before you get to wear it again. I don't think you need to post anything... just remove the banner...
Yeah, Tramp, I'm with you - I'm torn about the not talking about it thing. It misses the point - and it's not encouraging the honesty I think is absolutely vital to success. It's hard - I think people need to face up to their choices for themselves and with the team, but somehow we have to figure out how, as a team, to make it less acceptable. No, we're not going to throw someone out for cheating, but it's not what we do, accept, and expect as a team, either..
I don't know how to make that compromise. There's a big gray area in there, and it's hard to figure out how to parse it...
Hey! Support MY banner..
I think everyone got a good kick in the azz. Onward!..
Hi Ladies, I started Medifast January 3rd and I just wanted you all to know it's your thread I come to when I need motivation to stay OP. In fact I'm here now because there is 24 boxes of girl scout cookies sitting next to me at work. So what did I do? I logged on and came to this thread and I'll be darned if those cookies do not appeal to me at all now.
Please keep up the tough love because you are helping more of us than you know!!..
Chris - The team was around for more like 2.5 years with only a handful of cheats the entire time. And it was a number of newbie cheats and the traditional "You are too mean to me" responses that ended up splintering the Rogues an year ago. That was also the time when the boards started changing for the worst. People THINK they want to be 100%, but the reality of that is much harder than they think..
As for discussion. If there is a true, "OMG what the heck did I do kind of slip", then yes. Maybe we should discuss it here to try and help the member find out why it happened and what they can do to keep it from happening again. But for those "Oops. had a [insert excuse - cranky, stressful, TOM], I don't NOT want to hear about it, not on the board or in a PM. I have no tolerance for excuses..
Just me and my opinions...
Way to go, bigyellow. They are boxes of pure vile evil. Nasty tasting sludge. Made in dirty, roach infested kitchens and packaged by trolls with dirt under their fingernails...
Years ago, I was in a 12 step group that was led by a very wise woman who'd been a sponsor for many successful people over the years. Every once in a while, she would talk about people who talk the talk but don't walk the walk, and how, if the group lets that happen unchallenged that we just became enablers instead of what we were supposed to be - a group supporting each other in truly healing..
It's not just a problem for the person with the behavior - it's a symptom of a weakness or a problem with the group. There's no compromise for an addict, or an alcoholic - or an overeater - we are either dry, or we're not dry. We're either in recovery, or we're not in recovery. And as a group, we're either 100%, and endorse 100%, and expect 100% of each other - or we do not..
The words matter, of course. But it's very easy to allow compassion to let us not say the things that should be said. For that matter, it's hard to know what things should be said, and when. When does a person need smacked, and when do they need a hug? When are they using the expected words just to get a pass from themselves and the group, and when do they really know and understand and embrace the words they're using?.
We've got a lot of recommitters here. Heck, I'm one of them in the sense that it's taken me many, many diet failures of all kinds to get to a maintenance program that is working for me today. Today, I'm "sober", but I've had my share of "slips" in the past. The thing that is common to all of us recommitters is that somewhere along the line we gave ourselves a pass - and then another pass - and then another - and then we were fat again..
We shouldn't be in the business of giving out passes to each other. The one thing we can all say is that we don't want to be fat anymore, and who wants a pass to obesity? To me, tough love should be about calling out the pass, the lie, the excuse, the whatever you want to call it..
Just not talking about it is kind like pretending that Auntie Mildred tripped over a rug instead of being falling down drunk. It's a polite fiction...
Even though we all need support there are some demons we have to learn to conquer on our own and some "victories" you celebrate in private. If you were off plan for two days and still lost, that should be kept to yourself......if you lost 5pounds and rocked the plan then you should be here shouting it from the rooftop..
Struggling emotionally and mentally should be shared so that you can feel the strength from your teammates before an off plan moment happens......
Yes! I agree with this. I really hate hearing "oopsies!" confessions, but I like how people confess, get themselves slapped by people holding them accountable, and move on back on plan..
BTW, you know what staying on plan gets you? Moving down a size. Happy "I fit into size 12 jeans" day to me!!!..
Congratulations! You're gonna be sizzling on the beach next week!..
As one of the cheaters....
I felt admiting here was a way to be honest with myself and the people I find inspiring. I did not do it to be absolved, but a way to re-declare my committment. Kind of admititing I sucked and I didn't want to pretend I was being faithful to the groups beliefs. The kick in the gut shame is a real eye opener..
But I fully understand about keeping this a 100% OP talk. That's why it's a 100% Tough Love group. So posting on a blog, or PM, email etc makes sense. I don't plan on going off plan so I'm not worried..
And in the 4 days i've been 100% from my stupidity, I've lost 4 lbs. So thank you for your support, and sincere apologies for having anyone question their belief in this group's purpose...
Thanks ladies!!! I have to retry on on the summer clothes I bought a few weeks ago for my trip. I might need to make a return or two for a smaller size..
I need some tough love. I thought the best way to get it is to join this group...
Hey, no one is beating on you personally, or on anyone else. The discussion is about the group and what we want from the group, that's all...
So... I do hear the group being very firm and very committed to the OP lifestyle..
I do hear that my wrong choices affect more than me..
I do hear you very much want to keep this a 100% OP group, which includes not screwing up..
I do hear you say you want a place that is free from hearing about failure too..
I hear that this is for people doing 100% really... and if you can't (not can't, but don't) stick with that, then go bring it up somewhere else..
This group is to support people who are 100 percenters..
And if a person fails to be 100% they should not bring the rest of the group down with that news....
Not to be mean about it, just saying that's not what is wanted here as in, "There is no try, there is only do.".
So - am I hearing you right?.
And, I didn't make up an excuse... I was just being honest and expected to get some tough love.... I chose not to talk about food, or how bad it was so as not to distract you all by seeing how stupid I was..
I wanna be 100%, but like a motorcycle gang, I haven't been here long enough to earn my patch... I think it is a good idea to "Earn your banner".
Um, so, I don't plan on going off plan again.... I don't expect a pass or a hug or a kiss... I expect to feel the heat (which I do!) and not ever make that stupid choice again... because 100% OP really works..
I will say that being snow bound for two days with a 5-year old and a grumpy husband all the while my boss yelling at me through email is enough to make me want to pull my hair out..
But I haven't even considered going OP once thanks to you ladies! I'm very thankful for this group...
Tip toeing into the clubhouse.....
The way that.
Has responded to many people who made.
The wrong choice.
While trying to be OP is one of the "ah ha" moments that I have had this second time around..
I will hear.
Why did you make that choice?.
Did it make you feel better?.
Did it ease your angst???.
I get it..
So now this second time around instead of feeling the seemingly impossible pressure of 100%OP, I ask myself these questions.
I make a.
To go off plan. It has worked and I am 100% OP like I never was the first time..
Another big difference is that I just cannot.
"hand the broom over to anyone".
Anymore because if I said "don't worry"....etc, I feel so hypicritical..
I also garner so much from the TLers and their mission...
I didn't take it personally but I want everyone to know how much I do appreciate their toughness and I don't want to be a part of a reason someone stays away! (ok so I guess that is taking it somewhat personally)..
I'm gonna go drink my water and pretend to like my pudding...
I am persuaded that it's the wrong solution to pretend Aunt Matilda isn't tanked. So I retract my suggestion for modified rules language. I do really want us to have a way to hold the line, though. Removing your banner if you go off plan sounds good to me..
It has been an amazingly powerful part of my support to know that Chris, Corbie, etc are always going to be preaching the 100% message. I like to pay that forward by preaching the same, and living the same. I was really blissed out by being in a whole group that was doing this as well, and I want us to preserve that, in whatever way makes the most sense for staying real + committed..
In other news, things are fantastic w/ Morty and I get to see him in 6 hours and 20 minutes. Not that I'm counting...
I'm not sure why, but that question just resonated with me today! Fist in the air - "I AM!". Thanks for the upper!.
I hate to brag, but here in the Pacific NW, we have 50 degrees and bright sunshine. Of course, it's one of the 23 days of sunshine we get each year, so I'd best shut up about it or God is going to dump rain for the next 40 days.
Of course, He just might anyway..
I had about 2,000 snow geese land behind my house this morning, 3 days after the hunting season closed they are finally coming out. Spectacular in the sunshine..
Onward with the OP day! Kim..
Yay Freya! I'm guessing we won't be seeing you much in 6 hours then, huh? lol!.
Welcome to the other newbies that have recently joined. Glad to know you are still interested in joining after you know what we are wanting out of this group. To me that says you are on board and understand and that will help make us stronger...
Yeah It has just been gorgeous here the past few days, huh?..
I like the idea of removing the banner. I have only been here 4 days so I haven't copied the banner yet, but that sounds like a good plan to me. I love the idea of not having any cheat talk, and I agree that to an extent that would be enabling the behavior, but I also believe that people should be able to be honest with the group. Not a long rambling discussion of why you went off plan or any excuses... but at least to be able to say "I made a bad choice. I don't feel good about it, and I want to make better choices." To me, that doesn't seem unreasonable or that it would bring the rest of the group down in any way.
P.S. I had a Dark Chocolate shake for the first time today and I think it is gross. I must be weird because I've heard other people raving about it!..
Well, I've been a bit outta the loop with my travels and my poor mamma of late..
Soooooooooooo, I do remember when I last chatted here that many posts were becoming a bit draining regarding the Cheating Stuff..
After reading today's thread, it seems like many of us are struggling to come up with a way to handle all of this..
Since Day 1 of Medifast for me, That was August of 2007, I steered clear of those types of conversations, since they rarely did much for me, other than have me focusing on cheating again..
Sweet Radiationgirlie came up with a wonderful word for our Team White back in the day..
Any off plan food was just called SLUDGE. It had to be in all caps and that was it..
No details, no descriptions, nothing, zip, nada..
I'm with Corbie in the fact that we have to balance honesty with need here..
Just telling a cheater not to post it here, won't help the cheater. It might even make them cheat more. Since 90% of all addicts thrive in the darkness and secrets places. Hence the many gals who run thru a drive thru and ditch the evidence before getting home. Or waiting til everyone is asleep to finish of a box of SLUDGE..
Here is what "might" work for our team..
What if a person struggling would just come here and say that..
It might go something like this:.
Hey guys I'm struggling today..
I bet you dollars to donuts (sorry for the pun) that the comments and support and ideas would be flowing from this group of women Who are on compassion overload (ha).
Just think of how different it could be..
Instead of coming here AFTER the fact and the damage done, if we all committed to come here FIRST. Then there might not be any damage..
I will also lay down a bet that for every one who posted that struggle, there would be 50 who 'lurk' and read it and will be helped by the responses from OnPlan MFers..
Also preparing for any event is a good idea..
Come here and pick the brains of the pros. Ask them how they managed a dinner with Aunt Suzie and her famous homemade SLUDGE?.
The list goes on and on, but one thing for certain:.
If we say we are 100% and we aren't, then our words are meaningless where ever we post on this site..
Cheating compromises everything. Not just your own plan, but the integrity of the group, too..
I'd rather see us all work together to help people STAY on plan, rather than just smack 'em around after they have gone off..
What do you all think?..
Sadly, if nobody ever cheats there's no reason to ever have the conversation - and if there's ever a reason to have the conversation, there's no way for the trigger to ever believe that it's not a personal indictment of some kind..
Not one single thing I said was intended to be pointed at anyone who had confessed to cheating. Not one. I had NO ONE in mind for any of the points I wanted to make. All I really wanted to say is that if we can't be honest with each other, there's no point in talking about it at all..
The banner is a statement of purpose. Taking it off removes the statement. I know the intent is to say "I let down the group", but you're also removing your statement of intent to stay on plan. I don't object to it as a plan, but I also don't want to see people slinking away in shame, and giving up on what we're trying to do - which is help each other stay motivated to be on plan, all the time, every day. This is about taking control of our lives...